Well, maybe not leave completely. I just want things to slow down. At least a little. I just had a lovely vacation and yet, little more than a week later, I'm back in the rut. Sort of.
It's not really that bad. I have lots of good things in my life. I'm fortunate, to be sure. What I miss, at times, is what I remember as the simpler times in my life. The peaceful times when things happened at a slower pace.
I was thinking today about something very mundane: hanging clothes on the line. I remember shaking out the diapers and hanging them, two to a clothespin, along the wire clothesline in my backyard. I would go out with an old rag, while the clothes were washing, and clean off the wires.
When the clothes were washed, I filled the basket and carried them out in the backyard. It was usually a sunny day and, if it was breezy, the clothes would dry quickly. I would be back out in a few hours to gather them off the clothesline and fold them into the basket.
Nothing smells better than sheets hung out to dry. To me, anyway.
Long, leisurely days filled with babies and diapers and clothes hanging on the line. Pulling weeds with a toddler's “help.” Sweeping, mopping, dusting and cleaning with a little one on my hip. Ah, the antithesis of a feminist, I guess.
There were times to rush and there were times of great activity, too. But mostly, there seemed to be plenty of time. For everything.
I do think the pace of our culture has sped up. I know that leisurely times are few and far between, for me, anyway. There is always something that needs to be done right now and something that needed to be done yesterday. And then, there's always tomorrow. Or the next day.
I also know that some of the things that seem important at the time, really aren't. I remember staying up most of the night, the night before Easter, to make cupcakes that looked like Easter baskets. I dyed some coconut green, for the grass, and put miniature jelly beans on top, like Easter eggs. I used pipe cleaners (remember them?) to make “handles” for the Easter basket/cupcakes.
I was so proud of my creations. I just knew that my kids would love them. They looked so festive. How could I have known that my kids wouldn't like coconut? To this day, my kids don't like coconut. I could have gotten some sleep instead.....
Maybe it's just my rose-colored glasses: things seemed so simple and so sweet back then. I realized at the time how good my life was and I did appreciate it immensely. I had the best of everything: family, home, purpose, and sweet little babies.
And now those babies have babies of their own. And life has gotten more and more complex. And the earth is spinning much faster than it seemed to back then. Or not....
I think I'll just sit down and savor the moment....
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