Today...

The sun is setting

Yet the twilight lingers..

Another day

Slips through my fingers.

Another day of life

On my tab, mounts

Did I choose

Something that counts?

Did I accomplish

Something brave or bold?

Is there another story

That I have told?

Is this world

A better place?

Did I put a smile

On someone’s face?

Of the countless things

I wanted to do…

Did any get done?

Did I follow through?

Did I tell those I love

What they mean to me?

Did I paint a picture

For them to see?

Did I finish things

Already started?

Did I share kind thoughts

Before friends departed?

Have I done

What’s needed today?

Have I said

What I needed to say?

And now, at last

As this day is done

I think I’ll go watch

The setting sun.

Sorrow comes and sorrow goes....

Sorrow comes and sorrow goes…

The feeling is fleeting but the pain lingers.

How can I live a life filled with sorrow?

When did the joy slip through my fingers?

I have known pain and crushing disappointment,

I gave them their due, then sent them away.

Sometimes lingering in a pool of self-pity,

Other times, losing them in the light of day.

Life is full of those moments of sorrow…

That turn into days and weeks and years.

Seconds, and minutes and hours lost

Because I gave in to my worst fears.

I cannot predict what sorrows are waiting

To inflict pain at the worst possible time.

But then, again, what time is best?

Does pain ever have any reason or rhyme?

And can we really live in a happy world?

Devoid of pain and suffering and sorrow?

How can I appreciate the sunshine today,

Unless I know that it might rain tomorrow?

So every day, I appreciate life’s little joys

They help me assuage the moments of sorrow.

And if the clouds are raining today,

Then the sun will surely shine tomorrow.

Such a simple verse you are reading,

And really not so very clever.

But these simple thoughts expressed

Abide with me, in my heart, forever.

Lemonade...

I’ve been here and I‘ve been there

In and out and everywhere

Up sometimes, and then, down too.

Sometimes red and sometimes blue.

I’ve had the urge to scream and shout,

I’ve stuck out my lip and tried to pout.

I’ve folded my arms across my chest,

And told my kids: “Mom knows best.”

I’ve lived through things that were a test,

And always paid my dues—with interest.

Took up the gauntlet, and fought the fight,

Tried to always do whatever was right.

Turned my cheek, gave life another chance,

Went out in the rain and smiled and danced.

Whistled a happy tune when I was scared,

Offered thanks for all the blessings I shared.

Tried to just put one foot in front of the other,

And set a good example, since I was the mother.

Smiled at the good, cried through all the sorrows,

And always hoped for much better tomorrows.

And somehow, in going from here to there,

In and out and everywhere..

I’ve been lucky: on a steady course I’ve stayed,

When life hands me lemons, I make lemonade.

The Comforters....

They are everywhere, in every land,

Their numbers are legion.

Living in every city, in every town,

In every village and every region.

They do good works so quietly,

Not wasting their time on praise,

Good thoughts, kind gestures, a touch

Fill many moments of their days.

They are The Comforters of this world,

Helping others with their giving,

Bringing comfort to those who need it,

And giving Life back to the living.

The Comforters know, in their hearts,

That the deed is in the doing,

No need to publicize or share,

Good deeds are not for viewing.

The joy is in the giving to others,

The peace is in knowing who you are,

And The Comforters shine brightly,

Like each quiet and brilliant star.

For every kind and caring gesture,

To every heart that is battered and torn,

The Comforter can only hope,

That a new Comforter has been born.

And, if that dream comes to fruition,

And each inner Comforter is released,

This world will be a much different one,

Full of quiet, and comforting, peace.

The Days of My Life...

I’ve never had wealth.

I had power for a while but, 

I gave it back.

Knowledge, I’ve gained

Over the years

Serves me well when I need it

My looks are fine but 

I don’t stand out

I am just one of the crowd.

Blessings come and blessings go

Sorrows followed by bouts of joy.

Seeing the people in my world

Through loving eyes.

Walking gently through

The days of my life.

Enjoying what I can and 

Ignoring the rest.

Working hard each day

To provide for my food and shelter.

There is only one thing that I have

That you cannot have….

No matter how hard you may try.

You can never, and I will always…

Be trying to be the very best 

ME.

Let Peace Be...

Farm boys left the plow behind
Picked up a gun and went off to fight.
Landing on some far off beach, frightened
Falling, forever, before the fall of night.

Surgeons fighting desperately to save
A jagged, bleeding nearly shot-off limb.
Chaplains trying to keep souls nourished,
Saying prayers, softly; pleadingly sing a hymn

Nurses going from bed to bed
Trying to care for the wounded and dying.
Always with a smile on their faces,
No one needs to see them crying.

Astronauts fighting the world’s cold war
Lost in an instant in the capsule’s flames.
Others died in the sky, years later
Does anyone even remember their names?

Many wars have been fought by this country
Always, it seems, in the name of peace.
War declared on other countries, that’s true.
More wars fought here, to say the least.

Wars against more deadly foes
If loss of life is what we see.
War on poverty, inequality, ignorance
Disease and injustice, it seems to me.

Lives laid down in the name of freedom
Lives lost so that others might live
Lives lost to help the human race.
There is no more that one can give.

How can we ever repay those who died,
Giving the ultimate gift they had to give?
How can we honor their memory,
Except by the example that we live?

So let there be no more wars on this earth
No more death and dying needlessly
No more hurry to fight those battles
And please, Dear People, Let Peace Be.

I Cannot Help But Wonder Why???

I met a little guy, 5 years old, in my travels as a home health nurse. 

He was dirty, and skinny, and had no shoes. When he smiled, his front teeth were all metal. But when he smiled, his eyes sparkled, and I had to return the smile. He lives with his grandpa who is confined to a wheelchair. The little guy is grandpa's caregiver. He was fascinated with my nursing bag and wanted to see everything in it. I wanted to give him something, so I gave him my tape measure. You would think I had given him a winning lottery ticket! He hugged me for an eternity. 

I couldn't stop thinking about him today; and I derived no comfort from knowing that my own grandchildren live comfortably. I wrote this for that little guy.

Is there some plausible reason why

If God made us all the same,

Some people live in abject poverty

And others vacation in Spain?

Why are children born with birth defects

And heart-breaking anomalies?

Why, in the world’s richest nation

Are there so many poor families?

Prenatal care, post partum checks

Well-baby clinics and education

Why can’t this be a reality

In the world’s richest nation?

Preventative medicine, annual check-ups

Should be a routine part of health care.

Keep people well and functional

And keep them off of welfare.

Children in Appalachia

Just want to learn to read.

Their parents never learned

Too many mouths to feed.

Children in Mississippi

Just want a place to live.

Charities look for volunteers

With building skills to give.

Children wandering darkened streets,

Their parents gone, or unknown

Their fondest hope, and greatest wish

Is to find a warm and loving home.

Children who fear going home

To torture and abuse

Children living a silent tragedy

From perpetrators on the loose.

Is this just an isolated problem

Magnified by Media sensation?

Or is this a horrific travesty

In the world’s richest nation?

We have to look at these problems

The depth, and breadth, and scope

For these children are our future

These children are our hope.

I Give Myself Permission

To Be A Woman:

To recognize and appreciate that which makes me different from a man.

To recognize and appreciate that which attracts me to a man.

To wear dresses, and perfume, and carry a huge purse, if I want

To paint my fingernails and toenails hot pink

To wear a toe ring….a Toe Ring…….how appropriate!

To wear my favorite bangle bracelets.

To Be A Little Girl Again:

To sit on the floor and teach my granddaughter to play jacks

To color outside the lines, if I want

To play “dress-up” at the second-hand store

To sing my favorite songs, out of tune

To laugh for the pure joy of laughing

To say “EWWWWWWWWW” and “Whatever”

To Be A Professional Nurse:

To be a nurturer, a teacher, a friend, and a confidante

To be a fighter, aggressively seeking what my patients need

To be an expert, providing the quality care my patients deserve

To be funny, and fun, and smiling, bringing the sunshine into their lives

To advocate for issues that are important to me, such as child abuse

To Be A Friend:

To enjoy the gift of friendship that has been given to me

To treat each of my friends respectfully, and with caring

To appreciate the things we have in common, and 

To celebrate our differences

To “be there” for them, as they always are for me

To trust and be trusted

To Be A Lover:

To find in another the love that I seek

To appreciate, and not question it

To give of myself completely and not hold back

To treasure the gift that he gives me

To find joy in our relationship

To find love in our lifetime 

To discard expectations and value what really is

To give my heart and receive his in return

To Be All These Things At One Time:

To find my joy and infuse it in all my relationships

To seek knowledge and find it in unexpected places

To give more than I receive, at least initially

To appreciate fully the gifts that I receive from those I love

To hold dear the principles upon which I was raised

To demonstrate my concern for others every day

To laugh at myself, instead of others

To find humor, and love, and caring in out-of-the-way encounters

To be open to change, and embrace familiarity

To be a worthy occupant of this crazy world!

My Mother..

Her natural beauty, accentuated by her smile,

Her graceful poise, and sense of style.

Soft, flowing dresses with lace for trim,

Long, flowing hair and figure so slim.

Looking so regal, walking on Daddy’s arm,

Always getting her way, she had such charm.

Constantly busy, with good social skills,

Single-minded, with the strongest of wills.

Her laugh when she finally “got” Daddy’s joke,

Or quietly reading, beneath the cigarette smoke.

Her turned-up nose, when something appalled her,

The joy in her voice when Daddy called her.

Her meatloaf was awful, and the green beans would squeek,

Strong housecleaning skills, but cooking skills were weak.

Her garden was beautiful; she loved it out there,

And she wore a white gardenia in her dark brown hair.

She wasn’t perfect, but she always tried to be kind,

And when she wasn’t, well, I didn’t really mind.

For you see, to me, she was like no other,

A woman, so special: she was my mother.

She’s been gone now for so many years,

Yet time can’t erase my mother’s tears.

It was much too soon that we had to part….

Though she’s gone from my sight, she’s alive in my heart.

Happy Mother’s Day

Sunrise, Sunset….

Wherever you roam, wherever you be

Please come Home and spend sunset with me.

The day is long and filled with chores,

Working all day and shopping in stores.

Buying the food and fixing the meal,

I cook, you wash dishes, that’s the deal.

And finally, when the day is done

And we’re slipping fast, just like the sun

We’ll sit together on our couch, at last,

Talking quietly about the day that has passed.

The talking dies as the miracle starts….

Breathtaking red sky warms our hearts.

Together as the sun dips at last into the sea,

My hand in yours, your arm around me.

We’ve weathered together another long day,

And ended it, always, in just the same way.

Watching the sunset, regardless of the weather,

When we are once more together, always together.

And tomorrow is another day...

Thoughts On Being A Nurse..........

What should I do when all seems lost?

When it is gone, where does hope go?

When dreams die, do they fade away?

Or is there something I should know?

I work each day as a home health nurse,

Dealing always with illness and dying.

Providing support, and comfort, if I can

To those who are angry, or sad, or crying.

On and on the suffering goes

Hurting everyone in its path.

What kind of Being could be in charge?

Why are so many subject to His wrath?

Is there no light at the end of the tunnel?

No source of renewed hope and grace?

Is nothing that is done going to help the suffering?

Why is this such an awful place?

No! Stop! Don’t go there anymore!

Don’t spread the blackness and the doubt!

I reach inside my heart of hearts,

And pull a ray of sunshine out.

I smile and laugh, and hug a lot,

Giving back what has been given to me.

Seeing the goodness and worth in everyone,

Hoping that they, too, can see.

Life is a gamble, life is a challenge

For every bad thing there is something good.

If I could spread sunshine and love every day,

Trust me, I’m a nurse, and I surely would!

Spring….

Winter’s pale, dark days have given way

To the joys of Spring, once again.

Frigid Arctic cold has retreated

Now blustery winds blow puffy clouds around.

Melting snows provide the thirsty ground

With nourishment.

Flowers bloom, against all odds.

Events that caused such discomfort

Give way to things that now delight.

Dark, shivering cold reluctantly gives way

To golden sunshine and all things bright.

Renewed, refreshed, revitalized, reborn

From Winter’s death, we have arisen,

To walk along the garden path,

Taking time to smell the roses

As we pass by.

Life is full of seasons, too…

Just like each calendar year.

As one time gives way to another,

We look back at memories made,

And ahead with a heart full of hope.

Stay, my friends, on the garden path,

Don’t give in to the slippery slope.

Some say we should heed Nature’s call.

Life Goes In A Circular Fashion

I came into this world, conceived in love, and welcomed by adoring parents. I grew up in love and then fell in love, and the circle of life continued. I often wonder what my purpose is on this earth: I give to others of the abundant love that was given to me. I rejoice in the sunshine and smell the flowers along the way.

Where am I going? What is it that I am supposed to be doing?

Sometimes, I think I know; most times, I know I do not. I do believe that it is not the destination that matters: it is the journey. I have had an interesting journey, perhaps an enviable journey.

I have suffered with others, and I have learned and grown as a person. I believe that it is not the triumphs that make us better people, it is the tragedies……I have learned a lot from my own successes; I have learned much, much more from my failures. I have learned to accept compliments and, more importantly, I have learned to deal with disappointments.

I am still learning……..

Life goes on in circular fashion, each morning wakes anew
With sun and clouds and crisp air, grass covered with dew.

I wake in anticipation of the day’s unfolding possibilities,
Yesterday, today and tomorrow have many similarities

Yet each is an entity unto itself and different from the rest
Each day brings new challenges, and surprises, at best

To keep us ever delighted with the dawning of the new day
And help us see what joy we bring, to each other, I pray.

High noon brings the golden rays of the sun overhead
Warming me, or bringing the rain clouds instead.

The day is half over, half spent and half left to go
How will I get from here to there, I really do not know.

Looking both ways, before I cross the street at midday
Morning is gone; afternoon is here, heading toward the evening way.

Assessing quickly the day’s events, what have I left to do?
Oh yes, I will hurry home, and spend some time with you!

And as the sun sets slowly, off in the western sky
Someone new is born, and someone else must die.

And the circle of life remains unbroken, from birth to death again
And none of us knows where, and none of us knows when

Our circle will be completed, and our journey will be over
May mine end in sunshine, lying peacefully in the clover.

On the wings of alabaster angels, whose company I keep
May I be taken gently, to my everlasting sleep.

Choices...

Each day, when I wake up,
I make a conscious choice:
Hide myself in silence
Or bravely find my voice.

Go out and do the work
That I’ve been trained to do?
Or take another direction
And leave the work for you.

It isn’t always easy
Or even a lot of fun
But I know I feel better
When my work is done.

I’m really nobody special
I’m just another nurse.
Sometimes I care for the sick,
And sometimes, I write verse.

Life is not all good
And life is not all bad
I just try to make each day
The best one I’ve ever had.

Am I just an idiot?
Too dumb to see my Fate?
Or is my Happy Heart,
A very lucky trait?

Whatever life’s meaning,
No matter what the reason,
I’ll deal with things head-on
Each in its due season.

Please don’t think ‘cause I’m smiling
That I don’t know the score.
I know how anger and grief feel,
I just like Happy more!

Words

Words swirling, flying about
As if they are attacking me.
Words coming from my head
Just wanting to be set free.

Words that tell the story
Of the daily life I live.
Words that paint a picture,
To My Beloved, I will give.

Letters form the syllables
And syllables form the words
Words then come together
And soar just like the birds.

Words that let me describe
The beauty on this earth
Words that help to quantify
What all this beauty is worth.

Words that offer a description
Of the daily wonders that I see
Things that populate my world
And do bring such joy to me.

Descriptive words, in sentences
That sometimes need to rhyme,
Words congregated in such a way
Their meaning lasts for all time.

Love Softly Spoken...

His words fall gently
On my happy heart
Visions are created
From the very start.

Lulling me so sweetly
With peaceful meaning
Professions of Love
My heart is gleaning.

Tenderness portrayed
In the spoken word
Feelings expressed
And softly heard.

Time together
Such precious time
Time to share
A Love divine

Closeness achieved
In such simple ways
Bonds that last
Through all our days.

Love defined
Love expressed
Love that is shared
Is always the best.

Forward!

Forward! Moving slowly, moving surely
Heading toward the future, you and I
Healing, revealing, ourselves to each other
Always truthfully, never with a lie.

Questions occurring daily, hourly
Answers appearing, but not as quickly.
Minds full of questions, never answers
Words reveal themselves to us thickly.

Who are we, what are we doing
How did we get to this place?
Is there something that will be revealed?
Or is it as plain as the nose on my face?

Why do things happen the way that they do
Why are tears shed over the littlest things?
Who can decide what is important?
Who knows what tomorrow brings?

Why would we travel this unknown road
Heading toward who knows what
If we didn’t have some sense of peace
That at the end is what we sought?

Do we need an explanation
For every misplaced turn?
Is there a need to understand
Every lesson that is learned?

Can we just accept our fate
And bravely move on ahead?
Trusting that the eventual outcome
Will not be something to dread?

Are we confident enough in our sight
To know that we truly cannot see
Just what is around every turn
And what will happen eventually?

Do we have enough trust in each other
And enough faith in what will be
That we can walk hand in hand
Toward the future, you and me?

A Chance Encounter: Chapter 11

Finally, Seth thought, I get to buy this woman some dinner!
Wait! She has been through hell today, is tonight the right time?
Table for two please, in the corner where nobody can see her poor face!
Seth pondered his dilemma, holding her as close as he dared.

They walked silently from the emergency room toward the corner.
Rrrrrrring! A new, irritating sound broke the sweet silence:
“Hello? Hi mom! How’s Sarah? She is? Tell her I miss her, too!”
There goes tonight! Seth could feel his anger building.

How selfish! Was his next thought. She could have died today!
She has suffered through a traumatic experience
That left an indelible imprint on her sweet face.
How could he expect her to go out to dinner tonight?

“It was my mom” Annie shared. “Sarah is going to spend the night
With her cousins. She wanted to say ‘good night’ to me.”
She was smiling at him. He felt his face flush and a smile appeared.
“So, dinner then?” He heard himself ask her pleadingly.

“Oh yes! I’m starving” Seth realized he was starving too.
“Where would you like to go?” He wanted her to choose.
“Could we go down by the lake?” What a good idea!
Just you and me, some food, and a front row seat by Lake Merritt.

They found a deli, purchased a simple meal and a bottle of wine,
And headed toward the lake. “Bench for two” Seth thought out loud.
Balmy evening, beautiful woman, and finally, a chance to get to know her.
Life is good! Seth smiled at her and kissed her cheek ever so gently.


posted 8 months ago, updated 12 minutes later
(This chapter wrote itself this afternoon...there may be more)

Finally, Seth thought, I get to buy this woman some dinner!
Wait! She has been through hell today, is tonight the right time?
Table for two please, in the corner where nobody can see her poor face!
Seth pondered his dilemma, holding her as close as he dared.

They walked silently from the emergency room toward the corner.
Rrrrrrring! A new, irritating sound broke the sweet silence:
“Hello? Hi mom! How’s Sarah? She is? Tell her I miss her, too!”
There goes tonight! Seth could feel his anger building.

How selfish! Was his next thought. She could have died today!
She has suffered through a traumatic experience
That left an indelible imprint on her sweet face.
How could he expect her to go out to dinner tonight?

“It was my mom” Annie shared. “Sarah is going to spend the night
With her cousins. She wanted to say ‘good night’ to me.”
She was smiling at him. He felt his face flush and a smile appeared.
“So, dinner then?” He heard himself ask her pleadingly.

“Oh yes! I’m starving” Seth realized he was starving too.
“Where would you like to go?” He wanted her to choose.
“Could we go down by the lake?” What a good idea!
Just you and me, some food, and a front row seat by Lake Merritt.

They found a deli, purchased a simple meal and a bottle of wine,
And headed toward the lake. “Bench for two” Seth thought out loud.
Balmy evening, beautiful woman, and finally, a chance to get to know her.
Life is good! Seth smiled at her and kissed her cheek ever so gently.

A Chance Encounter: Chapter 10

Rushed out of the bookstore to the waiting ambulance,
Seth only catches a glimpse of Annie as she goes by.
Eyes closed, face battered and bruised, he can’t decide:
Should he cry for her, or go upstairs and kill the man who did this to her?

The crisis worker is conferring with the police captain.
Mr. Langston, the policewoman holding little Sarah, and Seth are ordered out of the bookstore.
As he looks around the street outside, Seth can see that the SWAT team is in place.
This is surely the strangest—and worst—day of my life.

Minutes turn to hours, the stand-off continues.
Sarah has been taken to her grandmother.
Mr. Langston and Seth decide to go to the hospital.
Annie is okay.

She looks up at him: the bruising has not diminished the beauty of her eyes.
She smiles at Seth and says “hi”, a casual, friendly “hi”
Not the kind you would expect after a day like today.
Seth is amazed: Annie is okay. Annie is okay. He says it over and over.

The standoff has ended.
Russ surrendered peacefully.
No shots fired, no further injuries sustained.
The only evidence of the day’s events is on Annie’s face.

Russ is taken to a mental facility
Where he will be placed back on medications
For his Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.
He will receive the help he needs for the pain he suffers.

Annie is ready to be released from the emergency room.
Mr. Langston offers her a ride home.
Then he notices that Annie’s eyes are locked on Seth’s
And his on hers. Bookish man says his good byes and leaves.

“Do you think we can talk now?” Seth asks with a smile.
Her smile answers his and she replies: “yes”.
Arm in arm, they walk out of the ER and into the balmy evening.
“How about some coffee?” “You owe me dinner” she responds with a laugh.

A Chance Encounter: Chapter 9

He raced across that same street, again.
Only this time with more urgency than ever before.
Mr. Langston was waiting for him at the door.
There was an ambulance, and a fire engine in the street.

“What happened?” Seth heard himself ask.
“Nothing, yet” was the guarded answer.
Bookish man told him that Annie’s ex had showed up
At the bookstore this morning.

“He was demanding to see Sarah, and threatening Annie”
The terror in his voice transferred instantly to Seth.
“Where is Annie now?” Seth was terrified.
“He’s holding her hostage, upstairs”

Nothing in his life had prepared Seth for this scenario.
He hardly knew Annie and his worst fear was that he never would.
“Who is Sarah?” he asked bookish man.
“She is their daughter. She is four.”

Seth rushed in, only to be stopped by a policeman.
A crisis worker is attempting to talk to Russ, Annie’s ex husband.
“Russ, we just want to help you. Let Annie go so we can talk.”
No answer. Seth could hear his heart beat.

A policewoman is holding a small child. A little girl with reddish hair.
And her mommy’s sparkling blue eyes. She is looking at him.
He is keenly aware that, before this is all over, she may be an orphan.
He has never felt so helpless in his whole life.

The crisis worker pleads again: “let her go, man, let’s talk”
Seth hears a sickening thud, oh God, is Annie all right?
He cannot breathe. His eyes are watering. Why is this happening?
Annie staggers down the stairs and collapses in a firefighter’s arms.